[edit] Family Rituals 가정의례
Weddings and funerals are the most important ceremonies in Korea. As Korean society industrialized and modernized, it lost much of its traditional coloring, but these ceremonies are treated with the same seriousness as they always were.
[edit] Weddings 결혼식
Spring and fall are Korea's wedding seasons. The format is determined by the individuals getting married or their parents. Religious ceremonies are performed in churches and temples, but most happen in wedding halls (yesikjang 예식장). Many are scheduled around noontime on Saturday and Sunday, when it is easy for large numbers of guests to be able to attend. Subsequently, areas near wedding halls are often crowded with guests and their cars on weekends.
[edit] Wedding Invitations 결혼 초청장
Individuals getting married send wedding invitations (결혼초청장) to acquaintances and relatives. Unlike the ordinary party invitation, however, wedding invitations do not state that the recipient needs to confirm whether or not they will be attending. Nevertheless, it is common practice in Korea to at least telephone the
person who has sent the invitation and congratulate them ahead of time if you will not be able to attend the wedding ceremony.
[edit] Greetings and Congratulations 축하인사
The both sets of parents of the individuals getting married will be standing by the entrance to the wedding hall. Greet these parents formally, and only then congratulate the groom (sillang 신랑), with a handshake if you are a man. The bride is not present at this time, as she will be in a waiting room elsewhere.
[edit] 'Congratulatory Money' and Gifts 축의금과 선물
Foreigners visiting a wedding hall for the first time are often surprised at the sight of guests standing in line near the entrance, handing envelopes of money to someone at a table who is taking names. In Korea, however, it is a natural part of a wedding. People put cash in white envelopes and give them as gifts, as this is a way to give practical help to the couple starting a new life together and the parents that have raised each of them. Money in envelopes given in this way is called gyolhon (wedding 결혼) chuguigeum (congratulatory money 축의금). The practice originated in the old social tradition of everyone helping each other put on a wedding, since the event requires a large sum of money all at one time. Along with money, people also write simple words of congratulations on a note, and on the outside of the envelope write the names and addresses of the person of persons who are giving the envelope, if for example a group of friends are giving one envelope together. There is no predetermined amount that should be given, but depending on how well you know the individuals getting married and on your own financial circumstances, it is common to give in units of 30,000won, 50,000won, 100,000won.
You may also give a present instead of chuguigeum. In this case, the present should be sent directly to the house of the marrying couple. If for some reason you are suddenly unable to attend a wedding ceremony, you may send a congratulatory telegram (축하전문) to the wedding hall or the couple's home.
[edit] Meals served at the Wedding Ceremony 식사
When the actual ceremony is over, a combination lunch and wedding banquet is held. During the "wedding season," restaurants located in the vicinity of wedding halls are often crowded with wedding guests. It is considered a major discourtesy to, after having eaten, leave without having greeted the couple.
[edit] Funerals 장례식
Funerals are the most solemn ceremonies in Korea. You should know what is expected if you are going to keep from making mistakes.
[edit] Notice of Passing 부고장을 보낸다
Notices are sent to acquaintances telling them of the date and cause of death, and the location and time of the funeral. If there is not ample time for this, informing people of the event by telephone is also acceptable. With rare exception, most funerals are a three day process. They are held in homes, hospitals, funeral halls (장례식장), and temples.
[edit] Procedure for Offering Condolences 조문절차
- Place a flower or light incense on the altar on which sits a framed picture of the deceased (yeongjeong 영정). There is no need to bring flowers or incense as these are provided somewhere near the altar.
- Then step back and bow twice, all the way to the floor, then do a "half-bow" from your waist (it doesn't matter if a foreigner lowers his head in silence).
- Turn to the chief mourner (sangju 상주) and bow once.
[edit] Staying Up All Night 밤샘
Individuals particularly close to the deceased or the chief mourner usually stay up all night in front of the altar, together with the chief mourner. Following the placing of the body of the deceased in the coffin, they may also go to the cemetery or crematorium.
[edit] Condolence Money 조의금
Jouigeum (조의금), or "condolence money," is given at funerals. There will be a special box (조의함) at the entrance to the funeral site for you to place an envelope containing jouigeum in. Offer words of condolence to the chief mourner and carefully place the envelope in the box. The amounts given as jouigeum are similar to
the money given at weddings. People generally write set expressions of condolence in Chinese characters on the envelope, but a foreigner may wish to write simple words of condolence on a note inside the envelope, and then on the outside write their name and address.
[edit] Hoegap Celebration 회갑잔치
In Korea, a person's sixtieth birthday (hoegap, 회갑) is a large celebration called a hoegap janchi (회갑 잔치) and organized by the individual's descendents. It is a unique kind of celebration that takes place in China and Japan as well. The word hwangap is sometimes used along with hoegap, and it is an expression of respect for the elder celebrating his birthday, something that originates in the Asian way of thinking. In the past, especially when medical benefits were not shared by everyone, living to the age of sixty was something to be
congratulated about.
These days, however, average life expectancy has increased, and so sometimes a person's sixtieth birthday is celebrated quietly with family and relatives, and instead the person's seventieth birthday (gohui 고희) is observed as an even bigger celebration, known as a gohui janchi (고희잔치). Both kinds of birthday celebrations
used to be organized and prepared by having guests visit the house where the person lived, but these days, in part because of the complications of preparing food, people usually celebrate at a buffet restaurant. The descendents offer large bows as they wish the person good health, and, to make sure the person is having a good time, will sing and dance and work to create a party atmosphere.
If you are invited to this kind of birthday celebration, bow hard from the waist and convey words of congratulation to the person whose birthday it is.
Chuguigeum is sometimes given at this kind of birthday party. Some people choose not to accept chuguigeum, but at most such celebrations there will be an area where these monetary gifts are accepted. The amounts given, also in white envelopes, are similar to weddings and funerals.
